There are three very important things we need to know about love…..unfortunately, no one knows what they are!!
I have no idea where my ‘ponderings’ are going to go in the coming months and saying something about the concept of love seems so appropriate. We’ve just finished using it in cards and seasonal greetings, even while it may have been dormant for a good part of the year.
The accomplishing of my community projects in 2009 is dependent on the strength of my relationships. I am struck by how often those relationships seem to imply varying levels of love. Or do they?
“What levels? Does love have levels? I certainly don’t know!” Does anyone know?
‘I love you’. Now there’s a loaded phrase!! I think I’ve seen enough books and articles about it to paper every inch of the continent! Do they all make any difference? Looking at the world, as a ‘how to,’ it certainly makes me wonder if they have given us anything more than spin.
Maybe we should just ask more questions and let the soul’s answers appear individually for each of us.
Love is a question. I say that to keep the lines open for when it comes up again and again…as it must! How could I see my partner, children, grandchildren, (including a new great-grandson), sit down to my piano or write a few words of poetry and think I can pare it down to size, or even figure it out? Actually, how could I even just look at nature, the universe, and not be in love!
Sure, it would be easy to ‘seek cheap closure’ and look at what countless authors and poets have written. About their own experiences, okay. As ‘instructions’ for the rest of us, I’m not so sure.
I know I get confused at times and need a friend to notice what I am not noticing, when I refer to love. Sometimes just a, “Did you really hear what you just said?” is enough to make me stop and re-think. Other times, maybe not so much, but at least I have someone with whom I can de-brief.
Do we love because we are ‘commanded’ to do so? In the past, I’ve been told that I cannot truly love unless I belong to some organization or other. Huh?
What is ‘forced love’ besides being a manipulation which merely adds a measure of guilt, reprimand, and sanctions to confuse the issue?
We think we are teaching our children to love by ordering them to say the words. What are we teaching them, and ourselves at the same time?
If I say ‘I love you’ what am I in effect ‘doing’ to you or hoping to create? And could I, everywhere, publicly say,”I love me!”
Would it be more authentic to just say ‘I love?’ Is ‘I love you’ about you, or really about me?
What the heck is ‘falling out of love?’ Can I turn it off and on, if it was truly there in the first place, simply because circumstances have changed?
Is love ‘something’ that got implanted in my youth and I am now controlled by it?
Is it a part of my survival mechanism and invisible to my attempts to utilize it?
Am I only able to express my own brand and is that the best I can do in life?
On a lighter note, whatever the heck it is, I think love’s real purpose is to break down our defenses. It makes us do crazy things that ultimately will allow our soul to come out of the shadows. When we are giving it free rein, it opens us up to more verve, risk, and shoves ‘safety’ to the sidelines for just a moment or two so we can play! It can add spontaneity in our families and other relationships. When everyone knows that behind all our actions there is love, don’t we have a bit more room to move? Less assessment and judgment?
How about if we use an expanded form….” I love you. I know I do because I’m having fun saying it!” There might be some soul in that!
Love includes all sides of life, even the shadow. It’s a good thing it does, because that’s who we are, and being that is what matters most.
What the world needs most in 2009 is authentic love, and maybe we need to return to it as a question and take a new look. That might matter.
Rich